Before You Know It
Director: PJ Raval
Following the lives of three different gay men who are navigating through their twilight years.
Before you know it is a serious take on the plight of 3 gay senior citizens. It’s almost like a less funny and far gayer version of The Golden Girls. All three are in a different region of the US and all are experiencing the life of a Gay Senior Citizen in their own way. Robert runs Roberts Laffite in Galveston, the only gay bar in town. Ty is an activist in Harlem who is supporting the Senior LBGT community with his group SAGE during the time frame the legalization of same sex marriage in New York takes place. Dennis is a widower who in his 70’s decides to explore his sexual identity and goes by the name Dee when he is in Drag.
Robert owns and still sometimes performs at his bar Roberts Laffite. Laffite’s is the place where anyone in the LBGT community can go and immediately feel at home. The boisterous and good hearted Robert “The Mouth” deals internally with a court case that could result in him losing his bar.
Ty participates in passing out information about his group SAGE the only group of its kind in Harlem that supports Gay Senior Citizens. While Ty is promoting the good word on his organization, New York legalizes same sex marriage and Ty soon finds himself a best man. Even in the Gay community some people are the Bridesmaid and others the bride.
While both Robert and Ty have uplifting tales truly showcasing friendship comrade and love within their tight knit communities. The oddest and most fascinating story is of self loathing Dennis a father and widower who realized after his wife passed away, that he is a gay man who likes to dress up in private and go by the name Dee.
Dennis lacks the positive outlook on life of Ty and Robert who celebrate their community ties. Dennis has no ties in fact his family has no interest in him at all. Resulting in him traveling from his home in Florida to a gay assisted living facility in Oregon. When you think of a Drag Queen you think of a loud boisterous man with outrageous outfits, outlandish wigs and humor with an abundance of charisma. What you get with Dennis is a quiet man, with minimal makeup (due to his advancing years he doesn’t think it would matter), a sour attitude, old lady thrift store clothing and quite possibly the single worst wig that has ever been made. To see Dee out and about you wouldn’t do a double take or ever confuse him for a woman in fact Dee talks in his normal voice.
We follow Dennis as he attends a Gay Cruise as well as participates in a parade. What starts off as an inside look into Dennis goes from interesting to creepy ending at sad. I don’t know if it’s due to him getting into the scene in his later years. Watching an old man, live his life lonely and sad, discussing how his life was pointless and how he needs to figure out his end game is painful. To see the same man fail so terribly at drag and to have to do it alone is almost heartbreaking. Dennis breaks every gay stereo type that has to do with good taste and personality. He trolls on the internet and is lucky to get in his words a “wham bam thank you ma’am” from a younger gentlemen caller. His home is a mess and no self respecting Drag anything let alone a “Queen” would put on that god forsaken wig.
The film length runs long and could have benefited from some tightening up.
The three parallel stories provide ample drama.
There are some lessons to be learned, the term “gay community” really has an emphasis on community, with community you can watch history being made as your friend’s get married, you can wear a pair of dick nose glasses in a drag show to raucous applause. Without them you end up sad and alone in a horribly bad wig. Within the community is the love and support to replace that which was lost when their families abandoned them.
Grade – 81
